2012 is looking good

Hello, and a Happy New Year to you all!

Things have been routinely busy since last I sat down at the keyboard. Here is an update of my various ventures:

TRADITIONAL SURROGACY PROCESS:
Still going. Monday the 19th December was the final day of appointments for this process, and was full on.

Stared at 8am with Mike freezing a sperm sample (Dr Stuckey won’t allow us to use fresh for the AI). That cost $450. Managed to squeeze in a coffee before the next appointment at 9.30

Which was the appointment with Dr Stuckey, that took an hour and a half, during which time Mike spent ages trying to explain to her what the RTC required her to do (paperwork) on our behalf- even though he had sent her two emails with attachments, with links and references to the appropriate clauses in two pieces of legislation AND the RTC website page that outlined all of the above. And she STILL didn’t get it, and we had to call her back later that day and go through it again. We still have not received the necessary paperwork from her. I am trying not to be project manager but it might be time to say something to Mike to spur him on to contact her to pull her finger out. The other part of the appointment was for her to ‘examine’ me and order a series of (pointless) blood tests that the lovely NaPro Dr (Hurworth) had already run three weeks previously. Sigh. Dr Stuckey made me go through the whole reproductive history, didn’t listen to my reverse T 3 issue (even though she’s a reproductive endocrinologist- she doesn’t ‘believe’ in it), and dismissed my ‘luteal phase defect’ as magical thinking. She also had nothing to offer when I asked her about DHEA to improve egg quality. Umm, isn’t this your job? To examine all hormonal interactions relating to the reproductive system and be up on the latest research and findings and give me an opinion based on what you have seen and read as a specialist in the field? Nothing. Hadn’t a clue. What she DID want to push was (her obviously pet project) metformin. Had I tried it? No, because I haven’t PCOS symptoms. Well according to her, recent studies show that metformin improves egg quality, regardless of PCOS. Well that’s interesting. And maybe it is even true. But I felt so dismissed and sideline by her steamrolling approach- don’t take into account other issues patient might have, like luteal phase defect, but Just Try MY Thing. I am not too keen on adding the bowl-churning metformin regimen to my already full program, and haven’t rushed out to start it. Ran the idea by Dr H, who said it wouldn’t hurt but in her opinion egg quality (if that even was an issue) would be rectified by the HCG protocol. I think I might give it a few months and see how I feel a bit further down the track. The best thing about that appointment is that she didn’t bill us. WOOT!

After a 5 minute bolt down of takeaway sushi for lunch, we had the final ‘implications’ counseling sessions (me and Mike, M + S, then all of us together) with new counsellor Jane Irvine, (following the gruelling session with Dr S) who was very human and compassionate and will fight our corner as far as pushing the RTC to make a decision sooner rather than later, and maybe even waiving our wait time. That cost $450.

The next appointment was with the dentist, to have my mercury fillings removed and replaced with something that is not toxic. I only had two, and they were very small, and probably not contributing to my reproductive problems, but it wasn’t a chance I was willing to take after Mike read, in his words, this ‘alarming article’ and advised me to have them removed at my earliest convenience. That cost about $500. All in all, it was a hell of a day, and at 5.30 the appointments were done and we drove home.

All four of us have now filled in the surrogacy application form, signed and dated every page, met all the requirements and have the legal document drawn up and ratified. We just await Dr Stuckey’s paperwork so we can submit the fucking thing and be done with it. The RTC meet again in mid-February and we would very much like them to be able to make a decision on that day. Let’s hope Dr S doesn’t drag her feet much longer. I’m sure she’s very busy but she only has to write a couple of short paragraphs, sign and send the docs to us. Would take her half an hour, max. Now she knows what she’s supposed to do. Unless she’s forgotten again.

I will be REALLY glad when this process is done. Mike is completely with me on the fact that we are not doing this again. Not this, or anything remotely like this. EVER. AGAIN.

SIL
Ok, glad that bit is out of the way. Let’s get the other nasty bit out of the way and then we can talk about the positive stuff. Mike’s sister asked us to be godparents for her 13 month old. It was very short notice, badly (for us) timed (Sun 8th of Jan- my Mum’s birthday, and also the first weekend we’d have a home getting a well earned rest in a month of bloody sundays) but we said yes anyway. Then she tells us we have to go up for the ‘rehearsal’ on Friday afternoon. Well Mike works until 5pm minimum, so we couldn’t get there for the 7.30 start anyway, and if we did, we’d be wasting the WHOLE weekend, not just a Sunday. I looked in my diary and couldn’t see a break until mid January, felt completely strung out and overwhelmed and unable to meet everyone else’s needs and had a meltdown on the kitchen floor. Mike asked his sister to see if the priest would allow us to have a stand in or something. A week later she hadn’t got back to us, even though he’d phoned and left messages several times. She finally answered on Christmas eve, was completely hostile to him, made out like he was being unreasonable, asking for a bit of leeway, and it was all about her and how busy she was with legal wrangles and no job and blah blah blah and they had to get their son baptised immediately as he was already 13 months late applying to get into the private Catholic school. (Not that WE have had any stressful events and commitments that we’ve been dealing with ALL FUCKING YEAR). He told her he didn’t like the way she was talking to him and made him feel upset. She hung up on him and hasn’t spoken to him since. I told him the whole thing had left a very bad taste in my mouth and didn’t feel good about proceeding to be godparents. It would commit us to who knows what expectations from her, for 20 years to come, and tie us to having more contact with her than we’d like, given that she is such an unreasonable, selfish, nay, narcissistic person. And set us up to fail to meet those unreasonable and unspoken expectations, creating more bad feelings for us. So he tried to contact her to let her know she needed to find someone else, and she would not pick up the phone. Four days later he had to send her an email just to give her the information. She hasn’t replied and she hasn’t phoned. And now he’ll get the silent treatment for a couple of years. Which is fine by me, because guess what? She’s pregnant again and having number two mid next year. Happy happy joy joy. Two out of work parents with a legal battle, a house they can’t sell and living in a poky rental place, at each other’s throats the whole time and running her Mum and Dad into the ground with free babysitting four days a week. But of course you go ahead and bring another kid into the situation. Great idea. And why? BECAUSE YOU CAN!

Right. Now we can move on to the good bits.

STUDIO
Three more sleeps until building work begins of my art studio extension. 9am Monday 9th Jan. Counting down the minutes! So excited.

NaPRO
NaPro Dr (H) is just so lovely I want to bottle her. This week I started the HCG injects. Peak +3,5,7,9. I have two to go, then a blood test. No progesterone pessaries until pregnant (which we are not allowed to try achieving until March or April), as the HCG apparently works like a mega dose of progesterone, for the purposes of building my lining and lengthening out the luteal phase. My insurance coughed up for the HCG injects so they are only costing me $35 a cycle. What a lovely surprise. We cancelled the ultrasound idea for this cycle as it was too difficult to organise in among the Christmas/New Year period shut-downs. We’ll do that next cycle, and the one after. Maybe even a third. We’ll meet in her office on Monday the 16th Jan to discuss timing for the ultrasounds and blood tests for the following cycle, and give her an update of how I felt on the HGC. So far I haven’t noticed anything. I hope we got the peak mucus day right. I did an OPK and got two lines, so I’m pretty sure it was correct, but we didn’t do a blood test because it was a sunday, and the results wouldn’t have come back until Monday evening or even Tuesday, and I had to shoot up Monday, so we took a punt. Mike is doing the injects as the needle is bigger than the IVF drugs and the amount of liquid is more, so it takes longer to push through. No bruising with this stuff though, which makes a nice change.

CHRISTMAS
Christmas was pleasant and uneventful and it was nice to be able to relax for a day or so in amongst the craziness. There were about 20 of us at my Aunty’s place on the coast, and it was lovely to be able to go for a swim first thing in the morning. Mike on call boxing Day though, so we had to leave 7am and trek home so he could get the on call phone from the previous doctor. Then the next day Mike’s Dad arrived until NYE, so I didn’t end up getting the week off between Xmas and NY that I promised myself. Turned out he was planning to come back to stay (Mike didn’t know how long for) on the 2nd of Jan, but I put my foot down and said he could only stay the Monday night then he had to leave Tuesday morning. In the end he didn’t come at all, which is fine by me. We had two sets of visitors on Monday and then I put myself in lockdown Tuesday and haven’t seen anyone or gone into town since. Three and a half days. BLISS.

PAYRISE
The other really really really good news is that Mike’s negotiations with the health department paid off, and they will give our medical practice the same financial incentives they are offering the neighbouring town. Which means he won’t have to go over there and do more shifts to get more money, he can stay here, do his same hours and get paid more for what he already does. YAY! This will pay for the studio extension, and now I don’t have to feel guilty that he’ll have to work harder to pay it off. Winning! Also keeps the dream alive of going to New York this October. I want the only reason we don’t go, to be that I am pregnant. Otherwise, it’s a month in the Big Apple and the New England states admiring the fall colour. By that time, all the crap associated with surrogacy applications etc will be well and truly over, and there will be no reason we can’t have a proper, uninterrupted break. 2012 is SO going to be my year!

GARDENING
The hardworking Canadian wwoofers (from September) came back for two weeks before Christmas and did an amazing job finishing several outstanding landscaping projects and other assorted tasks, including oiling the whole house, deck and railings, and three sides of the cottage. Mulched the entire orchard and hand-weeded the whole trufferie. And that was just the big stuff. Really gave us a leg up in the property maintenance and it means that I can now spend time doing the small stuff like summer pruning the roses, making lemon curd, apricot jam and whatnot.

We have had our berry crop come and go over the past six weeks (I made my first batch of raspberry jam ever and it was awesome!), this week I pruned the vines back, refertilised and mulched. The apricots have just ripened and we have been eating nectarines for the last week. Though they had a lot of bird damage, I think, or maybe it was from grasshoppers becasue I don;t know how birds got under the net, and I didn’t see any. Whatever, they are mostly damaged, which is a bit disappointing, but huge and juicy and delicious nonetheless. They just don’t keep once picked.

2012 PROJECT PLANS
I am doing serious bird netting research, as the orchard netting project has made it to the top of the list for 2012 (thanks to the pay rise) and hope to speak with a local net-structure maker next week. I want it secured by spring this year (October). Another task this week have been organise eligibility for access to the VAST satellite for digital TV broadcasting. Our local network has gone digital but we don’t (and won’t ever) get access, even with the current satellite. Analogue broadcasting will be turned off next year, so it is no TV or get on the VAST system. Took me a week of bureaucratic bungling but it is now in the pipeline and our local installer may have it up and running in a week or two. The final task of the week (my week off!! LOL!) is to organise renewing our passports. After requesting, online, that they post us out forms, I have had two emails and a phone call from the passport office about how they can’t post forms to PO boxes (but we don’t get residential address delivery here), and how I can’t request it for Mike, he has to do it himself because of ‘privacy laws’. Lordy Lord, give me strength. So unfortunate I have been overloaded with red tape bullshit in 2011, otherwise, this wouldn’t be as annoying as it is. Anyhoo, I will prevail. I knew it would take ages to sort out, which is why I am doing it now, so everything is in shape for overseas travel in October. No, of course it should not take that long. But I have learned my lesson about how long a thing can take, when it involves procedure, legislation and endless paper shuffling- not to mention making an appointment for an interview in order to submit the application!!

Mike’s projects for the year are to organise the installation of another rainwater tank for the garden/orchard; to organise a chap to come and dig trenches and lay pipes for new taps in strategic places in the the orchard and trufferie. In fact he needs to get the pipe thing done in Jan, and the tank by March so we can use it come autumn if the rains are early. Last week he finally completed the stem rock wall for our cob harvest shed, and this week he has been making test bricks to determine the best ratio of sand/clay/soil/straw to use. Turns out the sand we ordered was a bit too fine, making the bricks rather crumbly, so he is playing around with a larger grit now to see what he can make from that. Best to get it right before we start building the thing! But a very exciting milestone nonetheless, as we went on that cob building course the first week of Jan 2009. THREE years it has taken to get this far. Can’t say we are not determined.

If there is any money left over once the above-mentioned projects, holiday and surrogacy are done, we will get another couple of metal rollershutters for the loungeroom windows, as fire protection and thermal insulation. Then we’ll look at re-fitting the windows (and french doors) we can’t shutter with double glazing. But I think that’s going to be coming out of the 2013 budget….

NEW YEAR’S EVE
So there you go. A very quick roundup of the last six weeks. Probably I have missed out many things, but the most important stuff has got a mention. Oohhh- I forgot to mention the lovely New Year’s Eve we had at our friend Jeff’s Southampton Homestead, with a very small group of mostly gourmet food lovers and local food producers/retailers. What a buffet! I took locally grown roast shoulder of goat, there was local beef by the Warren who grew them, freshly caught fish, lamb and a couple of salads to go with all the protein. Jeff and Katrina made elderflower wine from a local crop, and I brought homemade cherry-plum cordial and some freshly picked nectarines and the last of the raspberries. Liss and I also made some wicked paletas for dessert, with combinations as follows: raspberry and pomegranate liqueur; boysenberry and cardomom gin; cherry plum and cointreu; morello cherry and sloe gin. Talk about living high on the hog! AND Mike and I got to sleep in the cottage. Woo!

COMING UP
I am heading over to the farm this saturday night, for my Mum’s birthday Sunday (now we are not going to Perth for a christening), then back that evening so I can be here when the builders arrive 9am Monday morning. Also have a phone appointment with my NaPro charting instructor. And on the Friday a trip to Busselton for my hair appointment.

Last time I was there, you may recall, I crashed the car. Well the insurance company have decided they want to fix it, not write it off, so they have taken ages to find someone who would do it, had to tow it to Bunbury, and now it is sitting in some mechanic’s there waiting for parts to come from over east (of course). And being the ‘silly season’ they are very very busy so probably won’t get to our repair until February. Great. Meanwhile we fiddle about with car shuffling and I mainly get to drive the hulking old ute around. Remind me not to get in a car accident again. It is highly inconvenient. I only hope the other party has had more prompt service than we, since it was not her fault in any way. I can only imagine how irritating it must be for her. I might drop into her shop next Friday while I am in the vicinity and take her a jar of my latest jam.

Monday the 16th of January Mike does another sperm freeze at 8am, then 10.30, 11.30, 12.30 we have counseling appointments with Concept fertility clinic and M+S for the donor egg project (which we are probably scrapping, but who knows how it will all pan out and we’d rather have it in the bag as a back up plan ready to go if needed), then a face-to face with Dr Hurworth at about 2 or 3 (I haven’t booked it yet). Then drive home again. Phew. I just hope to goodness that day is NOT a day I need to go for a transvaginal ultrasound as I am not sure I could squeeze one more thing in.

The Sunday before, a friend of Mike’s has got us all member’s passes to go to the cricket (3rd Test match Australia v India at the WACA, Perth). YAY! What a treat to have a relaxing, fun thing, before another day of yuckiness. I hope they play as exciting a match as the second test, which Australia just won by an innings and 68 runs. What a whomping! We will head up to Perth on the Saturday and try to catch Tin Tin in 3D that evening at the movies. Make a real weekend of it!

That brings us into mid January, and the monitoring of my next cycle (which is an hour’s drive to Bunbury every other day for a week). Mike is on call the weekend of the 28th. Then it will be Feb and nothing is booked, except my monitoring will be in there somewhere. I am trying to slow things right down, so no visitors have been allowed to be scheduled, apart from the family Tribal at Easter. Also by which time the studio extension will be finished. I know, this is months away, but in case I don’t get back here for a while, you know what I’m up to until then…